The Latest Offer

My biggest fear about this whole undertaking is that we are wishing on a star; that we are hoping to get something for nothing.

Take the most recent contact I've gotten:

King County, Duvall

19 acres for long term lease. Land is within the Farmland Preservation Program. In pasture for last 10 years. River water available. Potential for organic certification. Organic cow manure for fertilizer available. Buildings include: 100’x100’, 30’x150’, and 30’x65’ sheds that could be converted to other uses. 2 bed/1bath single dwelling (700 sf) available. Lots of possibilities. Land owner willing to work with you.

All well and good, but once again sounds like somebody would have to come in with some serious startup.

Is it unreasonable to want to go enter a lifestyle so far removed from your own?

No, that's poor phrasing.

Is it unreasonable to say, "Hey, farming happens. People do it. We're people. We can farm."

Bear in mind, Lindsay and I are not asking for anything even kind of resembling ownership right off. We're not saying, "Give us a lease on spec and if it doesn't work out, then we'll just walk away from it." We're saying that we want to learn. We want to work on a farm. Don't people do that? Are we too old?

I'm thinking we might need more education. So we're looking into internships now. We found this wonderful site that has a list of programs around the country. I'm a big fan of the Central Rocky Mountain Permaculture Institute in Colorado. They're full until Spring, though.

We have written to Green Flamingo Organics and Paradise Farm, both in Florida. We're probably going to write to two or three a day until we start getting favorable responses.

The whole thing is, it looks like we're going to have to shit or get off the pot, though we don't have a pot and we're a little constipated.

Got a call ...

... From another wonderful Virginia woman. She's not really old. She's just alone and has too much acreage to manage herself. She's originally from West Chester, N.Y. Got into this much the same way we would like to (i.e. just picked up and did it).

Here's the specs:

20+ acres
Raises turkeys, rabbits, hogs, and I think I heard cows
Grows everything from high-end peas to high-end artichokes to high-end Asian pears; looking to get into truffles
Building her own house out of old tobacco barns


She wants partners, not employees, but she seemed cool with the fact that we'd be coming into this with no money. I said we'd take a look at her place in October.

I'll keep you all posted.

Piedmont Organics

So Lindsay and I have wanted a farm for several years now. But the impetus behind our sudden drive for one was this article. It's about a program matching young aspiring hicks like us with older people who are looking to retire. It's got some shocking statistics about how the average age of farmers is 57 and 30 percent of them are over 65 and on and on.

Now, we could pretend that this alarmed us and we need to stem the tied of dying, small-scale farmers, but the fact is we just saw our dream life floating in the concept of "farm matchmaking."

It took some doing (you know, googling) to find out what these programs are actually called. FarmLink. Most states seem to have an individual program and they each have their own requirements (and fees). Some only want state residents, some only want experienced farmers.

One of the most accessible programs we found was the Virginia FarmLink. It's all online and we didn't have to pay an enrollment fee. The process is, we hunt down listings we like and contact the owners with our profile. So far it's actually yeilding responses. One woman, who sounds like one of the greatest, craziest firecrackers in the world, really wants us to come out. However, she hasn't worked much of her land yet and doesn't have anyone else and spends most of her time fending off locals who want to use her land for hunting and poisoning her dogs. It's a sad but hopeful tale, and though we would love to join her, we just don't think we have the experience yet. We'll probably talk more about her later because she is an awesome prospect.

Another one we got was an invitation to Piedmont Organics. This place looks absolutely perfect. The land is ready for mixed-use ... use. It's got most of its commercial viability already set up (delivery trucks, website, near D.C., etc.). It's raring to go (seriously, raring).

The problem is that it's for rent. They want $850/mo. for the house. For that, you would get access to all the land, the equipment, and there would be some people around to help train you.

But Lindsay and I have norhing to start with. So we're scheming. Maybe we could host the place like a timeshare, where people pay to have a place for a month or so. Or maybe we could go public just to support ourselves in the beginning and then buyout the shares once we've established our business. Or maybe we just move there and glue ourselves to the furniture and see if no one notices.

We're looking into it.

We could run the artists retreat. We could run it as a community farm or a teaching farm or a resort farm or maybe just grow sorghum (by which I mean hookers; Simpsons reference, look it up).

If anyone has any ideas, please share. Thanks!